Validation

You have heard the expression, "I am more than just a pretty face."

While a great number of women do want to "look and feel" pretty, there is a deeper cry, "please see me."

Many of us may want to be wives and mothers. Some of us even want to be appreciated for these roles. But, correct me if I'm wrong, we want to be noticed for more than a good meal on the table, everyone having clean clothes, a visually stimulating home, and our performance in the bedroom.

Most of us love being wives and mothers. Don't misunderstand what I am saying. But God said of Adam, "I will make a helper suitable for him." (Gen 2:18) In the sense of a partner or ally; the word "helper" does not imply subordinate status. The point is they were to be a team. Both bearing the image of God. Each having God gifts and purpose dropped into their beings even before conception. God says that He knew us before we were even born. In Psalm 139:16 in The Passion Translation it says this, "You saw who you created me to be before I became me! Before I'd ever seen the light of day, the number of days you planned for me were already recorded in your book."

A woman wants to contribute to her family, community and world by using the gifts God placed within her. Purpose.

I believe when a woman is not appreciated for her passions, gifts, strength, wisdom, all that makes her who she really is, then she will eventually succumb to "validation" in any way that she can obtain it. That is why so many young girls and women are enslaved to the world's expectation of what makes a woman, a woman. The idea that in order to be deemed beautiful or worthy you must have a perfect body with curves in all the right places, which, by the way, changes with the times. The pouty, full lips. Big, beautiful doe eyes offset by long lashes and perfectly manicured brows. Sexy, sensual clothing which leaves no room for mystery or the imagination. Voluminous, thick hair. You get the picture. If you are a woman...or a man...you already know.

Sure, many of us love to hear a compliment based on our appearance but there is a gaping, empty hole when that is the primary validation we receive. God intended for us to use the individual, uniquely ours gifts and strengths He gave to us. (Rom 12:6 TPT) He told us to encourage one another in our God-given gifts. To stir one another up and fan them into flames. (2Tim 1:6) So, if a woman feels alone in her gift, if she cannot find any place to exercise her purpose and grow in it, then she will begin searching for another way where she feels appreciated and respected even if it is a mirage. It is at that point that the lie of the enemy of her soul takes hold. She begins to feel that this is all she has to offer and her self-worth is handed over to the desires and lust of this world.

It is only when a woman knows, that she knows, that she knows her true-identity in Christ that she is able to use her gifts (even if it means she isn't validated) and not give into the temptation of a counterfeit acceptance. This takes spiritual maturity, which the Bible tells us, is rooted in love. (Col 3:14 TPT) Love for God, knowing the only acceptance we really need is His. Love for ourselves, to embrace that we are made exactly as our Creator King intended and that "He is enough, we are enough, we have everything we need". (excerpt for Havilah Cunnington quote) Love for others, focus off ourselves and onto those around us is good healing. Not to neglect the tending of our own souls but in balance. We cannot be self-absorbed. This leads to destruction.

This generation needs what you have. I can't stress that enough. God deposited inside of you exactly what this world needs. It is the reason you woke up with breath in your lungs today. The very breath of God empowering you to truly live.